I Love This Husband & Wife Stuff


#343: Book Review – Sacred Marriage May 8, 2012

Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas had a profound effect on me.  The message is that God designed marriage to make us holy more than to make us happy.  Marriage brings me happiness, but not always.  If you look to marriage only to make you happy, you will be disappointed.  Humans are lacking and we all have a hole inside, a loss, a yearning.  That lacking is supposed to be filled with God.  If we don’t fill it with God, we try to fill it with other things: shopping, food, power, alcohol, etc.  If we try to fill it with our spouse, no matter how wonderful they are, they will fail.  They too are sinners.  But if you fill that void with God, and have your spouse as a mate throughout your life, things will go much better.

The book looks at how we can use the challenges, joys, struggles, and celebrations of marriage to draw us closer to God and grow in Christian character.  It helps to see marriage as a kind of ministry, and a tough one.

“This is the reality of the human heart, the inevitability of two sinful people pledging to live together, with all their faults, for the rest of their lives.”

The book asks us to use the challenges of marriage as opportunities to learn more about God, to understand God more and to learn to love him more.  Marriage should push us to be more of service and to be less selfish.  Confronting our own selfishness has enormous spiritual value.  The focus should be on changing ourselves not our spouses.  It’s about spiritual growth and marriage is just the context.  It’s an excellent book.  Here’s a closing quote:

“Just as celibates use abstinence and religious hermits use isolation, we can use our marriage for the same purpose – to grow in our service, obedience, character, pursuit and love of God.”

Cover of "Sacred Marriage"

Cover of Sacred Marriage


10 Responses to “#343: Book Review – Sacred Marriage”

  1. peacefulwife Says:

    I LOVE this book!!!!! And his book “Sacred Influence” is wonderful for wives, too! It is a must read! Thanks for sharing!

    • Karyl Says:

      I’m glad you liked it. I will have to check out Sacred Influence and some of his other books. I am getting Sacred Parenting for a friend for Christmas.

  2. Luisa Says:

    Thanks for recommending it. I hope to start today. I’ve always know you can’t fill a void in your heart with anythign but God, JC and the Holy Spirit. Thanks for the reminder. Or rather I should thank the author.

  3. Luisa Says:

    Forgot one important messge. Thanks for giving me the book, It’s a precious gift. Books for me always are.

  4. Luisa Says:

    how many more days before this lovely site comes to an end?

  5. latestwithVR Says:

    This is a great book. My husband and I have been married for a short 8 years and I think this blog is simply adorable.

    • Karyl Says:

      It really is a wonderful book. I have loaned it to my sister-in-law but plan to re-read it throughout my marriage. Congrats on being married 8 years. I’m glad you like the blog. Thank you. 🙂

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